Exams

No good, the exam stress bug is biting me again. Exams are next week, hyiaks!

Woke up slightly earlier this morning at 845am ( I know that's not really early, but my red retro-looking alarm clock usually sounds at 930am, and I'm only out of bed half an hour after that). So its quite an accomplishment today...but i'm yawning away now as I'm typing this blog..is it the effect of waking up earlier? Or is it the Stochastic Modelling that is wearing me out?

Sighz, no mood to study and am stressed. Often at times like these I ask myself, what made me sign up for the programme and subject myself to unnecessary exam stress? I enjoy learning, but definitely not exams..if only there can be learning without exams..

Anyway, I came across these verses some weeks back, jotted them down on a small card, and have been reading them almost everyday...to know that God is there for me is a relief, and to know that we can cast our cares on him is a privilege that I'm really thankful of. Seriously, I dunno what I'll do if God didn't exist. I know I'm not going through some big trials (some may just say, its only exams duh..most people has gone through it anyway), but nonetheless, it really great that I can just lean on the Lord for strength anytime.

Fear not, for I am with you;

Be not dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you,

Yes, I will help you,

I will uphold you with My righteous right hand

(Isaiah 41:10)

Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength;

They shall mount up with wings like eagles,

They shall run and not be weary,

They shall walk and not faint.

(Isaiah 40:31)

The funny thing is that even though I'm a standard product of Singapore's education system, having gone through it for 15 years, exams is still something that takes getting used to. Because of exams, I'm missing out on some pretty important events happening over this weekend:

• Justina is back from China and flying off this weekend. Friends meeting up this Fri, but I'm not joining cos of exams. I'm thinking of asking them to meet me for dinner for an hour or so. But will how on this first.
• Another friend, Margaret is tying the knot this weekend and I'm skipping probably the most important day in her life again because of my exams. But will certainly meet up with her after she is back from her honeymoon!
• My hubby's frens from UK are transiting through Singapore this coming Sunday and I probably can't join them again because of the BIG E next week.

Aiyo..between exams and friends....given any time, I'll gladly choose the latter, but for practical and stress reasons, I've chosen the former.

So for now I can only send my best wishes to Margaret! May she and Yongkang have a wonderful and blissful marriage =) And for dear Justina, its been a long time since I've met her..may she stay sweet cheerful and pretty always! As for my hubby's frens, I hope they'll enjoy the day trip to Singapore (& I'm sure my hubby will try to be the best host possible).

It great to be able to "destress" myself via blogging. Now I feel a bit more awake..maybe its the blogging, maybe its the green tea, or maybe its just becos I'm away from my books =)

On the irony though, despite the negative stress from exams, I believe that somehow exams have a good effect cos it makes me contemplate and think more about life. But before I get carried away, and switch to the philosophical mode...it's time to hit my books again. Can't wait for exams to be over, so that I can finally meet up with my friends and get some life!!

My Home - Work in Progress Part III

After yesterday's failed attempt to enter our home, we went back again today to try our luck - this time round clad in our oldest & dirtiest slippers, just in case we had to trek though wet cement..we were ready for an adventure, and determined to get in the house..just to ensure there are no hidden surprises for us laterwards.

Lucky we made that trip back. Once we set eyes on the tiles in my master toilet...we knew that it was not what we wanted. We love the copper-looking tiles, but the grey tiles just look terribly out of place. After staring at the half-completed toilet for what seemed like almost half an hour, we decided a change was a must. Oh dear, my ID is not going to like the bad news. And my dear hubby decided to task me with the unpopular task of conveying the news to my ID. According to him, I have better rapport with the ID - maybe its becos I enjoy toking nonsense. But anyway, my ID was really quite nice about it...he initially misunderstood and thought we wanted to change all the tiles, and sounded relieved when I told him only the grey tiles had to go.

That's the master toilet. The copper tiles are there to stay, but we will be removing the grey tiles.

Looking into toilet from the pretty (but dusty) mosaic table

That's my hubby standing inside our wardrobe - deep in thought about our toilet.The bricks for the mini-wardrobe in my masterroom is up! Fantastically messy view from the kitchen. That's my fav slanted wall on the left. And of course, my hubby's fav mosaic table deserves mention too.

My absolutely open-concept kitchen!View from the living room into kitchen. How I wish the brick-look of that wall will be a permanent feature.The practical and cool hollow wall in living roomPosing for a shot right in front of storeroom, hee

My Home - Work in Progress Part II

Guess what! For the 1st time in my life, I'm blogging outdoors! The other exception was when I was so frustrated during my computing class that I was blogging from my school's lab...but I"m now seated at Starbucks sipping a cup of java chip frap, and logging on!

Call me a laggard..I dun deny I'm a techie idiot..never the first the own the latest gadget in the market. Partly becos of the practical side of me (or you can also say the cheapo/thrifty side of me). Good or bad that's me..and the not so-tech advanced me is using SG wireless for the first time....well at least I've progressed lah hor.

Just went to pay my new home a visit earlier...but the workers were doing some work on the floor (laying cement I think), so we weren't able to step into our place. So the following pics are all taken from the main door/window view =) A pity I can't see my wardrobe which was being constructed when I was there last week.

Nonetheless, quite a fair bit of progress I must say. The tiles for my kitchen and study are already laid. My hubby's fav mosaic table is up, and I love the slanted wall right in the centre of the mosaic table! Only gripe is that my place doesn't look as open as I expected...especially the wardrobe area..but I guess it's a sacrifice I have to make cos I needed more wardrobe space..despite my ID's persuasion, I knew that 4 wardrobe doors just weren't sufficient for me lah. So no choice, more space for shopping to make up for the reduced space.


This is the view from my 3rd bedroom. The hollow wall on the right is my fav feature of the house (although I kinda have a new fav now too - the cool slanted wall - love it!). Anyway you are looking pass the kitchen tothe yard, and the window at the far end is where my yard is.

This is taken from my main door, and looks directly into my living area. At the far end is my study area (where the slightly raised platform is). And that rectangular structure is the pretty mosaic table - my hubby's fav part of the house!

Another view of my living room, but this time round, you can see the hollow wall that serves to block out my corridor window.

This is taken from the corridor window just in front of the hollow wall. If you look carefully, you can see the other side of the mosaic table, and of course, the cool slanted wall! Looking at this pic just makes me smile..really excited about my new place...can't wait to shift in soon. Sighz, but I'm reminded I'll have to go through 2 more exams before my place is ready.

Celebrations

Attended my cousin's wedding on Sun (14 Oct). Had a lovely time catching up with my relatives and realised how much my cousins have grown in a span of a few months (the last time I saw them was probably during Chinese New Year), especially the boys. They seem so mature now.

The title of 'tallest in the family' has now shifted to my cousin Xinkai. My brother used to be the tallest in the family (partly becos he is the oldest), and then other cousins overshot him, and now the title has to be transferred yet again. Its amazing how time flies..and it made me realise how old I am now despite my occasional kiddish antics.

I'm hoping to post some photos from the wedding, and will do so once I get hold of the pictures. The wedding was held at Sheraton..food was good, company was great, and the wedding couple looked really blissful and loving. And my aunt (my cousin's mum) looked stunning that evening! My aunt is someone who doesn't usually dress up..but when she did that evening, she received compliments from everyone! Her make-up, hairdo, dress...she looked really pretty and so different. And she was so happy and excited that evening...probably becos this is such an important family event. This is one of the wedding dinners that I truly enjoy...partly becos I had the opportunity to catch up with my cousins, and also becos I could feel the joy that was radiating all around, especially from my aunt.

My cousin's wedding is actually just a day before my wedding anniversary - 15 Oct. For the first time in many weeks, I had a truly relaxing and enjoyable Monday evening. Was rushing to complete my tutorials on Monday afternoon, and thankfully managed to complete them. Otherwise, I might not have the guts to spend the evening out if my homework was left uncompleted.

We had dinner at Robertson Quay - this Japanese restaurant right next to Shunjuu. Its called Susi..something - can't remember the name. We wanted to try the restaurant as we noticed many Japanese eating at the restaurant (a sign that the food is authentic and delicious) the last time we dined at Shunjuu. True enough, most of the customers in the restaurant were Japanese. Even the chefs and some of the service staff were Japanese. It felt like we were in Japan. The sushi was fantastic, my hubby loved the ramen and was slurping off every bit from the bowl..although my teriyaki chicken was so-so only..but the miso soup was delicious! Considering that the price was pretty reasonable (ramen cost $10, my bento set only $15), we decided we will be back again.

After dinner, I just had to visit one of my favourite dessert shops - Chocoloate Factory. I was dying to eat both the blackforest cake and the shop's famed chocolate tart..but my hubby, having slurped up every bit of his dinner, was too full to share 2 desserts. So sad me had a tough time making a decision and eventually, with much hesitation, chose the blackforest cake instead. The cake looks really yummy...but did not taste as nice the last time I ate it..hmmz, wonder why. Since it was our wedding anniversary, we requested one of the shop staff to help us take a photo, but were informed that photos were not permitted in the shop. Wonder why is that rule necessary? Anyway, I still managed to sneak some shots...

The delicious-looking cake, that somehow didn't taste as delicious

Celebrations must be commerated with photos and many many photos..so after dinner, we took a short walk and found a good spot for photos. The background is supposed to be this colourful looking bridge, but guess my Nikon Coolpix not powerful enough to capture the background.

First, a normal shot

Then, an attempt for a funny bunny shot..Attempt failed...and vain him pushed me out of photo! After several tries..mission completed!

My Home - Work in Progress Part 1

Went to check out my place on Sunday..and noted progress in the renovation works (*happy*).

This wall is my favourite part of the house - both aesthetically as well as practically. The corridor window is actually just behind the constructed wall - which allows me to look out of the house, and yet gives me the privacy. Well-meaning relatives have indicated that the walls will probably trap dust...but I'll think of a solution to that next time. For now, I love this wall!

The contractor had actually built up the wall to the spare room wrongly..and after I told my interior designer on Fri evening, I was pretty surprised that the wall had already come down when I went to visit on Sunday evening. Their efficiency is quite commendable =)

The brick wall is where my TV will be mounted..just behind the brick wall will be the kitchen area....which as you can tell..is not really fit for cooking just yet.

That is my wardrobe at the far-end (just beside the window), made of concrete...my place will have minimal carpentry, mainly the kitchen cabinets, shoe rack and tv console. Otherwise, we are using alternative materials such as bricks, cement, concrete - which is good cos I'm not a fan of wood. I even suggested having my main door made out of glass, but was shot down by both my hubby and the interior designer. So guess there goes the cool main door.

As HDB ceilings are not exactly very high, we decided to do away with false ceiling (a feature that I'm also not fan of) for most of my new place, and will have black electrical conduits running across the walls/ceilings instead. Initially, I was a little apprehensive..but my hubby and I were beaming away when we saw the black tubes traversing our walls - cool!!! One more thumbs-up to my ID.

No Pain No Gain

A friend sent me this...very meaningful. May it serve as a note of encouragement to all (me included) who are feeling the 'pain'!

Blue

Feeling a little blue...have been frantically checking my gmail for the past few days waiting for a reply...sighz....reply finally came. I got rejected.

I guess disappointment is inevitable. But now I'm stuck with only one choice....should I continue with this choice or not? I wake up every morning asking myself whether I should continue. I hate the fact that it takes up more than 12 hours of my life everyday, that its schedule clashes with my good friends' weddings in Nov, that I cannot do the things that I wanna do.

I do my Quiet Time every morning now...and I always pray for God's strength, wisdom and peace to be with me as I go through the day. I know my life is not tough..in fact I'm very blessed by God. But I'm just unhappy with the hectic lifestyle I'm going through now, and am ever wondering what is the next best step to take. Deep in my heart, I felt that the reply I had been waiting for would be the option out..but I guess I felt wrongly. I wonder why....have gone a big round on this...I had given up hope, but then hope came back to me, and now its taken away from me again. What is the point of giving me a glimpse of hope if the positive answer would never come? Why do I have to face issues the roundabout way?

But well, much as I'm tired and disappointed, and actually having my self-esteem cut by quite a bit...I know that all things work together for the good of those who love Him. I'm reminded of a old poem/quote that I loved when I was in secondary school:

Lord grant me senerity to accept the things I cannot change,

courage to change the things I can,

and wisdom to know the difference.

Looking at issues from another perspective (big picture you know...cannot be a micromanager), this is not the end of the world and nothing to be too upset about. Actually the top concern in my life now is the many in my family who are unsaved..sighz. Pastor has been touching on Revelations and endtimes of late, and because of what I believe, it is scary what will happen to my loved ones when it happens. Whether it happens in my lifetime or not, I dunno (actually I hope it wun), but regardless, we can't run away from it. We can't decide when we will leave this earth, but we can decide where we want to be after this life. It is a simple truth that unfortunately many of my loved ones have not grasped. I've been 'preaching' hard to my hubby...but for those who know him...well...macham hitting brickwall all the time..I must go look for a sturdier hammer.

So this is my life. Feeling loads better after getting the above chunk off my head....well life goes on, isn't it.

Worst Lecturer I've Ever Known

Today is a Saturday and I'm in school for a make-up programming class. Have lost all interest in the subject, all thanks to my new programming lecturer. A pretty Russian lady, but who absolutely can't teach, and takes half an hour to set up the computer system for class. I thought my Calculus lecturer was bad enough, but she is worse.

Those who know me would probably be surprised. Why is Stella not paying attention during class? This is not the usual me. Since I'm not a born genius, sheer hard work is one of most readily used ammunition in life, especially for the gruelling course I'm in now. Sighz, examinations every 6 weeks and there are homework and projects to complete each term..I'm akin to a masochist who signed up for a year of torture, or to put it positively, an entire year of intense brain-flexing. My IQ level better improve after I complete this course, considering the number of hours I sit at my desk studying & solving problems everyday.

I have no problem working hard, cos learning is not always easy. But I have no patience for incompetent lecturers, and I'm seriously wondering how could the university have recruited such a lecturer. I don't recall having such negative sentiments about any lecturer during my undergraduate days, but to the lady who is muttering to herself at the front of the computer lab right now, she has managed to garner all my negativity and I'm totally shut off from what she is uttering. Even if i try to understand, I can't. Cos I have tried it for the past 3 sessions, but to no avail.

Thanks to one of my friends who recommended me thecplusplus.com website. I told a look at the website, and totally agree that it is easier learning from a website than listening her. Now I wonder why is part of my course fees going to this lousy lecturer. I'd rather pay the website for its clear and concise explanations, not a person who mutters to herself. I have no doubt for her capability in programming, but she simply can't teach!! And her dearth of talent in this area is torturing the poor students on a supposed lovely Saturday morning.

Anyway, cheeky me mananged to catch some shots using the PC during class, as a tribute to the worst lecturer I've ever met in my life:

Ok now me the complaint queen is done with her grouses for the day. Shall have a last ditch attempt to concentrate in class liaoz..what to do...there's a quiz in 2 weeks' time, sighz. So that's all for now. Adieu!